Hi all,
I have suffered with every single strand of OCD since I was 19. I suffered as a child but it manifested a lot in my early adulthood.
Over the last year and a half my focus has been surrounded on contamination: asbestos, silicone, lead. The main one is asbestos as I have artex ceilings. I have had the ceilings skimmed this weekend and went away for it. It was the hall, landing and my son’s room. All tested negative by professionals.
I was so proud of myself but I’ve come home and keep finding little bits of old artex and plaster in nooks and crannies. I have picked and cleaned with my hands and now I’m panicking beyond belief thinking what if what if?
I’m texting my therapist, I’m contacting friends who re plasterers, I’m googling and havin conversations with CHATGPT like it’s a wise, old friend. I know none of this is normal or helpful but it is probably the biggest exposure to this I have ever had.
I want to throw my mop away after I’ve mopped the hall but I know it’s my little OCD monster talking,
I am convinced that I’m day here allowing my son’s lungs to be filled up with asbestos fibres and dust.
I don’t know what I’m trying to do with this message. It’s probably seeking reassurance in all honesty but I know no other way when it comes to asbestos, everything else I can let sit but asbestos cripples me because it’s just the endless fear of the unknown
