Reply To: The last ten years of contamination and checking ocd. And where I seem to be now
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So far, no issues with the food, or indeed my pillow… I know that I move around a lot at night, tossing and turning, rolling around. I start off on my back, watching something funny on DVD. By the time morning comes, my face is buried in the pillow, the fabric of which is very rarely washed… I just don’t bother… A) It doesn’t seem to do me any harm, and B) If I wash it, it will be reinforcing the idea that it might not have been clean enough… And yet, I’m okay… As a teenager, most of my clothing would have been on the floor of my bedroom… And yet I’ve survived into my mid-sixties… I must have a really good immunity/defence system, or I would always be ill… And yet I’m not… I reckon I can use that as evidence for myself, to not feel guilty for not having my hands continuously in anti-bacterials… They would ruin my skin if used in large quantities… And indeed did, when I was at my deepest depths… Now it is just the occasional blip, a sudden thought, that sometimes I verbally talk back at out loud, defending myself, asserting my right to not be surgically clean… After all, I don’t expect that from anyone else…
God bless you for reading…
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