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  • #4852

      Hi there,

      small steps are progress, too. I am tired all the time even though I am not sick, I guess it is also the lack of stimuli and inspiration these days. I took a walk outside today to get some fresh air but unfortunately again something happened which made me become anxious of contamination and now I feel even more exhausted and devastated. And though I have only lived with my parents for a short time again, I am already ruminating about moving out… I am a bit frustrated because whenever I feel bad due to my physical diseases, my parents are very understanding, offer to make tea or cook sth easily digestible etc. But as soon as I say that I feel bad because I am experiencing frightening OCD thoughts, they react outright abrasively and aggressively. After the walk today my mother told me to stop as I was “a grown-up”.

      I am really concerned about how much space these thoughts have taken in my life again, the disgust seems to get worse and worse. And I am very angry because I am doing so well at university but could do even better (and generally enjoy things more) if it was not for the OCD…

      I would maybe like to do a PhD but then I am afraid I would lack the energy… In general I am anxious that I am just not fit.

      Anyway, I will also make myself some food now, I still need to eat.

      Wishes, Rosenrot

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