I’m writing on my phone and hope that my text won’t get messed up again like above…
It’s really hard to stay positive … not everyone in the apartment is new, the housing company told me that two of the people living there already moved in last fall. That’s scary for me because first, they’re maybe responsible for all the trash and dirt themselves, and second, if they’re not, the former tenant in my room probably was the culprit after all and the others will detailedly describe to me how disgusting (s)he was, that is my nightmare…
I still have this thought that, if I come back tomorrow and still can’t bear it, I will just pack everything I can, go to a hotel and then book a flight home. It sounds crazy but that’s how scared I am. And running away still seems better than, I don’t know, dying or turning insane.
I used to do an internship in a hospital a couple of years ago (I was with the nurses mainly) and oh I remember how thorough I was expected to be with all the cleaning and disinfecting. I attended a surgery once and the whole team nearly panicked when the surgeon realized he had lost some drops of sweat and feared that they had fallen into the open flesh of the patient he was operating on…they probably hadn’t, the patient got well after surgery and was fine. It was a critical situation though. Then again everyday clinic life was never 100% sterile, people would get visitors who brought food, books, other things from outside…and even the nurses made mistakes sometimes. Especially for people with rather healthy immune systems it is probably not problematic at all to eat food that’s not perfectly clean. I (sometimes) used to pet animals and then eat without washing my hands as a child and despite my parents’ warnings, I was always ok. I didn’t get sick, though the cat or dog could have rolled around anywhere…
Masks help but even if we touch them, they don’t immediately lose their function or become too “contaminated” I think, even if health experts are warning us…I still see people on public toilets leaving without even having washed their hands during these times but I doubt that they’re the main reason for the high infection numbers.
I’m too tired to continue. Let’s see what tomorrow will bring
Rosenrot
