Homepage Forums Support From Our Forum Community OCD & Intrusive Thoughts My life is over. Real-event OCD kills me.

  • This topic has 2 replies, 3 voices, and was last updated 2 years ago by wannabefree.
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      Hey, I hope you all are doing okay. I am doing very badly actually.

      I did inappropriate things when I was a teen and adult. I don’t want to go into the details, but I sincerely believe that I don’t deserve to live anymore. I am not going to hurt myself because I can’t do that to my family or friends. But I feel like I fraud. If they would know, they would want me dead too.

      I basically feel like an abuser.

      Forum Moderators


        We’re so sorry to read that you’re going through such a difficult time now and we’d like to help.

        We’re very concerned that you say: “… I sincerely believe that I don’t deserve to live anymore.” If you really feeling like your life isn’t worth living, you can call the Samaritans, who are always there to help you.

        The Samaritans have a free, confidential listening service for people in distress, open 24-hours a day, 7-days a week. Their volunteers are not professional counsellors but will listen and never judge you. Contact the Samaritans by:

        • phone 116 123
        • email:

        If you’d like to talk to (or email) someone who understands OCD and what you’re going through, please contact our OCD Action Helpline.

        Our Helpline is a confidential, unbiased source of information and support for people with OCD. Most volunteers have personal experience of OCD; all understand how it can impact your entire life. Contact our Helpline by:

        Just please remember you’re never alone and our forum members and OCD Action are here to support you.

        Forum Moderators


          Hi there. I once worked in a care home, where stuff went badly wrong whilst I was actually on sick leave… On my return I ripped my own practice apart… I did make minor documentation errors, but, everyone does… I don’t know what big stuff happened, but it has now since been closed down… I catastrophised my tiny errors, and felt very ashamed and embarrassed. I hope the lovely residents got somewhere else… But I had to get out before it killed me.

          That is all in the distant past… I cleared my name shortly after leaving. It is a scar, but it is healing. I throw myself into today, this very minute, the good things in my life. I’m not responsible for anyone else’s happiness, just my own. If they don’t like me, that is their problem. I actually approve of myself now.

          Yes, real events have occurred in my life, just as they do for everyone on the planet… Some real, but many imagined out of all proportion…  But us Ocd’ers are good people, perhaps we just care a bit too much sometimes?


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