I am not sure, maybe this is going to be my last post for a while, though this thread has become a sort of diary …
I was supposed to move to a new student hall yesterday. I had packed all my stuff and had had a bad night before, feeling very anxious about how it would be like. I have lived in student residences before and know that they can be awful beyond the imaginable. So I did not expect too much when I got the keys (it is not possible to see the rooms beforehand) and entered the partment where I was going to share bathroom and kitchen with other students. Still I was shocked. Someone quite stupid must have lived in my room, the heating was turned on fully while the window was open and lots of dirt had been blown into the room. The mattress is full of stains and the former tenant left an old chair with a dirty rug on it. I tried hard not to imagine how the person was like, what (s)he had all touched in the room…
Bathroom and kitchen were even worse, there is a rotting smell coming from one of the bathrooms and I quickly shut the door and did not dare to open it again. In the other bathroom, people left empty Pepsi bottles, cigarette lighters, and ash on the floor. They threw various trash into the drains (not just hair). The kitchen was full of old food etc. and it seems everything has been rotting since before Christmas I guess. I brought all my stuff to the room on Monday but hardly dared to unpack it. I could not stay there and now I packed some clothes and am staying at a fellow student’s place.
I feel shattered. I talked to the student housing company asking to send somebody to clean but I still did not receive an answer. I feel like just packing my stuff as quickly as possible and boarding the next airplane to Germany (though I have more stuff now than when I arrived and could not even get it all into my suitcases now). I shudder to even go back to the apartment again. I have never met one of the people living there who is responsible for these conditions and I don’t want to … there are mostly African, Arabic, Asian students living there and I just feel afraid, paralyzed. I want so save my stuff back out of this disgusting place but I don’t know how and where to go. Everything feels lost and I feel stupid for even coming to Scandinavia to study because apparently I just can’t handle such situations. I feel like crying but I’m at my friend’s place and without an own room, I cannot really call people and talk openly either. I wish I would just disappear.
