I think ocd creates a negative feedback loop in my head. Like I think, my girlfriend split up with me therefore I must be gay …it’s just all the different emotions and feeling and wondering why you plus the anxiety and thought all rolled in to one I guess. But did you ever have a emoty feeling inside ? That just won’t go away?
I was taking Citalopram for a bit but I might ask my new GP to suggest something else as I don’t think it actually worked or it may if jsut been a placebo affect ?
I know I’m not gay, like I would of known by now. My family are super open so I would of told them with ease. Never had any of these thoughts until my mums and brother started going back to work and I was left in the house by muself.
im just scared and worried that these feeling and anxiety won’t go away and essentially will start affecting more and more aspects of my life. I already struggle to leave to house to see friends or go to works I am worried it affect future relationships and just life in general.
I have nothing against gay people, I have some friends who are, doesn’t make them any less my friends or anything. But when I am on the train or out abs about I find myself looking at men and seeing what my response is. The worst is the responses (without being super crude) its like I don’t get one but I feel tingling down there and then it starts the whole cycle again.
im jsut at a lost wondering if this ever gets better I jsut want my old life back. This has really changed me.
