Also something else that’s been scaring me is awhile ago I was scared I was gay but then I started worrying about the current problem which honestly made me not even care if I was or not, but I still lost all attraction to men. Now when I see them I sometimes try and force myself to like them which only makes me feel weird and uncomfortable(even tho I used to like men without feeling any sort of uncomfortableness), but the thing is the weird feeling is different than the weird feeling I feel about the current theme. So like I’m scared that the feeling I feel about men is what actual false attraction feels like(cause it’s pretty noticeably uncomfortable to me)and I’m scared what I feel about the newer theme isn’t actually false attraction cause it doesn’t feel as gross as the forced feelings about men does, like I’m scared those feelings are too real. If that makes any sense. But maybe it’s just because I WANT to like men so it’s not like I’m scared I’m attracted to them so it’s more obviously a bad feeling, and since I’m more scared of the other theme it feels more confusing and more like that? Cause like the feeling with men there’s no question whether I’m with them or not, like I can tell it feels gross, but the other one feels not as noticeably gross I guess. So like why do they feel different? Can they both be bad or since one’s not as bad as the other does that mean it’s not false?
