I’m transgender. I also worry about potentially having ocd.
In the past, the fact that most who do are men has been a slight comfort to me. So, it hits different when I hear about women doing things like that.
I was watching a video about disturbing YouTube channels, which I usually enjoy, and they started talking about a transwoman who had a decently successful channel before she suddenly stopped posting. My first thought was that this would be a case of something horrible happening to her, like murder. But the truth is actually more disturbing. It turns out she was like them, and, well, I won’t get into details, but it’s very upsetting.
This, and several other cases make me scared I might be a monster. Like, I might actually have those desires. It makes me wish I were dead…
I know I’m not supposed to ask for reassurance, but I don’t give a f**k right now: Please tell me you don’t think I’m thar way, please.
