Something happened a couple of days ago

[wannabefreeParticipant]

Hi everyone… Well… Something happened a couple of days ago… A supermarket shop. Something that millions of people do every day without thinking. (If they didn’t, the shops would go bust). So, we got there by car, and parked up in the disabled bay, got a trolley, using a token to release it. Into the store, one squirt of antibacterial gel on my hands, and off we go. Up and down the aisles, face mask on. Everything is wrapped in plastic. Grapes, bananas, milk, block of cheese, ready sliced cooked ham, even bleach gel. We also had biscuits, breakfast cereal, bread in paper wrapping, Some frozen ready meals, and lots of canned veg and soups. A complete shop. I knew I would be spending over £45, I would therefore be not paying contactless by card, I would be inserting the card to the reader, and entering my secret number using the rubber buttons, and the enter button that used to be green(!). I got to the tills, and placed firstly Christmas stuff on first, as that would be paid for seperately first. Then, everything else went on the conveyor belt. Was it clean? To be honest, For a change,  I didn’t really notice. I chucked it all on the conveyor belt, we could sort it all out when we got home. The till operator goes quite fast, so I loaded the trolley quickly. I paid, using the bank card. Okay. The carrier bags were in the car… So out we went with the trolley. I got the bags, and loaded the car. Suddenly my wife noticed that one of the two flat packs of cooked sliced ham had come open a bit on one of the corners. Mmmm… To be honest, I didn’t want to put my facemask on again, cos it impairs my breathing. So, going back in the shop would have been a lot of effort. So, we agreed that maybe it was okay… Everything is loaded into the car, and I took the trolley back. Into the car, and away home. We chat until we get home, and get all the bags into the house. My wife put all the shopping away, whilst I prepared tea. We watched telly late into the evening. After my wife had gone to bed, it crossed my mind that we had no way of knowing how long the pack had been open… I know that normally we have to use it within a few days of it being opened. So I went to the fridge, moved the cheese and took out the two packs of ham. I figured that, as we wanted to use the meat in a couple of weeks, I’d throw the opened one away in the bin, just to be safe. On checking, To me, they both seemed fine, so they went back in the fridge with the cheese on top. I then stopped thinking about it. In the morning, Whilst preparing a sandwich, I casually asked my wife about the packs of ham. She went to the fridge and pulled out the offending pack. She passed it to me, showing me the opening. We decided that, as we didn’t know how long it had been opened, the one pack would go in the bin, and we’d keep everything else. So we did. Okay, as the till operator had handled everything to scan the prices into the till, had also handled previous customers stuff, I wonder, What is on all the shopping? I don’t know. I’d handled everything to get it all back in the trolley, and then into the carrier bags. What is on the steering wheel of the car? The bank card reader? I really don’t know… But what I do know, is that I didn’t clean any of the packets and milk bottles… And it’s a couple of days ago now. Some packs have been opened and used, and then returned to storage in the kitchen. And everything is okay. The cheese, margarine, bread, jar of Marmite… The remaining pack of ham will be used at Christmas. It is all okay… Definitely . I know that, because this has happened before… And it has been okay before… Whilst doing Exposure response prevention (ERP) with the support of my CBT therapist. There will be no need to clean anything. I have the evidence in my heart.  Today, we went for a ride in the car, we go out every two or three days, for a bit of fresh air. We took an airtight cake container back to a friend of ours. Was it perfectly clean? I really don’t know… Thinking back to the square tins of biscuits and chocolates we had at Christmas? Were they ever perfectly clean? Really? To be honest, We used to pass them around the family… Thinking logically, there is absolutely no way that everyone would have had clean hands… And yet, nobody got ill… Well, they didn’t did they? The antibacterials we use now are specifically about the Covid19 virus. Before this, a lot of people wouldn’t have worried. For us Ocd’ers it is a little more difficult. Biologically, there are good germs around us that need to fight the bad bacteria in order to become stronger. So, just maybe, supermarket shopping is okay. Sure, by law we have to wear face-coverings, but one application of gel on the way in, and then, yes, get it all in the trolley. We don’t know what is on the hands of the till operator… But, it doesn’t really matter… Not knowing is bliss… Why would we need to know, when most non-Ocd’ers don’t? Sure, commercial kitchens need to use the right chopping boards, to protect vulnerable patients and against greedy litigation solicitors. But At Home? We have two chopping boards, both of them white plastic. They get washed up with everything else in the sink, with ordinary washup liquid. And we’ve survived into our sixties. We do practice basic food hygiene rules, but don’t overdo it. Years ago I would even get antibac on my clothing, in my hair, between products in a shop. But now, let’s just do what our health service recommends, and get through this pandemic situation together… God bless you for reading.

Wannabe

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