Dreams are like intrusive thoughts – they’re involuntary and not reflective of reality. In terms of confirming your worst fears that IS fear talking. Whatever the theme nearly every OCD sufferer I’ve known fears loss of identity. Me – fear of hurting people If I DID hurt someone that’d be my loss of identity. I relate to what you’re saying about poor concentration and not being able to distract yourself which is anxiety unfortunately. I know you feel guilty about this and it’s affecting your family but you didn’t ask for this – it’s an illness. In terms of distraction have you ever tried mindfulness meditation?
