Wanting to “confess” (albeit false statements) is a compulsion of mine and I feel like I’m gonna shout things out which are out of my control but I just don’t overthink it because once I do the urge to do it becomes even stronger! (I never have shouted or “confessed”anything however it’s simply just my OCD telling me I’m going to).
I get an empty feeling inside all the time. Like I’m not anxious or anything just numb. I often feel this way when my anxiety has became too much and my body/ brain no longer feels anything. Sometimes this becomes an obsession as I worry the thoughts must be true as I’m not anxious about them anymore. However this is just another OCD thought and my body/brain has probably reached its maximum anxiety level thus is protecting itself by almost putting a barrier up to prevent me feeling anxious. Anxiety also subsides over time too! We can only reach a certain level before it will begin to fade this doesn’t mean the thoughts are true it just means we are feeling less anxious about it as we are realising there is nothing to fear as the thought is nothing more than a mere thought it’s not the truth!
I take citalopram and have for many years now. It seems to have helped my depression but my anxiety still spikes through intrusive thoughts but I can manage and control it through simply allowing the thought to be there and not trying to figure it out.
With ocd your body will be reacting to the stress of the situation thus the sensations you get. I get this when I’m super stressed, anxious or when I see something disturbing or disgusting on the news for example. I know this is a way in which my body responds to stress and I know for a fact.
OCD is a chronic mental illness however there is no need to worry about the future and if you will ever feel better or it will ever go away. Worrying about this is another obsession associated with OCD. I fully believe that we can live happy and fulfilling lives with OCD by practising the right tools. For example exposure response prevention (ERP). An example would be to watch a documentary on ocd and NOT overanalysing it or applying it to yourself. Or simply allowing a thought to be in your head without figuring it out would also be a form of ERP.
the therapist Ali Greymond on YouTube is amazing to watch. She has recovered from OCD and now helps others. So we can get better from it it just takes time and patience!
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