Hi again,
I am very exhausted. I am in the apartment and made my bed. Again… I just want to go home. There are ferries to Germany from here. I think maybe I should just have taken one.
I bought a candle (mango smell) and a calendar for the apartment and went grocery shopping. I wanted to clean the whole room today but then I only managed to clean the cupboard. Unfortunately it took more than a quick wipe, it was really sticky. I shudder to go to the toilet here (although it looks clean now) and I did not take off my shoes once. The non-smoky bathroom I use also smells a little bad and musty. I am frustrated because it seems no one was here to clean today at all! It didn’t look any different from Friday. But I’ve already reported so much to the caretaker, it’s tiring. The shower head leaks, too…sinks seem clogged. I don’t even know where to start.
Honestly, I feel terrible. My skin itches, my stomach hurts a lot. I feel like being forced to sleep in a horror house. I really think this all is not healthy for me. There are creeking sounds all the time.
I have called a German therapist on Saturday (a kind of emergency hotline). She said I could/should try to live here but always keep in mind that it is my right to leave if it is just too much.
<p style=”text-align: left;”>I wish I was back in the hotel… Or better, that I would have flown back home before Christmas.</p>
University starts this week. So it’s not only about surviving here at all but also about concentrating. I don’t know if I can do that.
