Hello everyone, I want to share my experience of the last 24 hours which have been absolutely terrible. Firstly, yesterday night I had a panic attack/breakdown because everything was becoming too much. Especially work but also all the rest of the complicated life that OCD brings. Secondly this morning I woke up way before my alarm and felt nervous again. I just stayed in bed until my alarm would ring I thought. I then started to snooze off again, starting to dream. I then suddenly woke up again and before I could do anything got up. This for me is very bad since my contamination OCD is very strong. I managed to go to the bathroom and wipe everything off with some toilet paper. But after cleaning that I cannot touch anything and feel super anxious. So I get tense and everything does not really go well. After finally managing to wash my hands I went back to my room and went to bed just to catch my breath. In the meantime I heard how my brother went to the bathroom and left the house. The intrusive thought of me contaminating the bathroom and not cleaning it after that struck me hard. I then managed to take a shower later and attend an online course. Then finally my mom called me in tears that my grandmother who is in hospital caught an infection which is causing pneumonia. At her 96 years this was terrible news and she was just about to leave the hospital for a minor fracture. Now I am sitting here with all these experiences, I just feel completely overwhelmed and my OCD is still not giving me a break. E. g. tells me that my brother has spread the infection in our apartment complex, a woman will pick it up from a doorhandle. Also, I am obviously concerned for my grandma, which I hope will get through this and if not that she can go in peace and without any unneccessary suffering or pain.
Does anybody have advice on how to get through this, especially the OCD aspects of it?
