Reply To: Wannabefree’s Friday night Blog…

[wannabefreeParticipantParticipant]

Hi everyone… I have come down with a really bad cold… Nose running, sneezing and headache. Will I pass it to anyone else? I most likely already have, and they me. It will probably last just a few days, and then I can get on with the runup to the Christmas period. A cold brings me down, and it makes me feel miserable, and unable to do much at all.

So, What of this ‘Compromise’ in the noun then? Well… It means to find compromise with things. Not be compromised. In our day to day living, We put on a coat when it is raining, but when the sun shines down, we remove the coat. Without force or fuss. A willow tree bends in the wind, but returns to normal height when the weather is calm. If it didn’t, it would snap off and be ruined. It finds compromise with the wind. And survives to live another day.

We can do similar. Something I do when rushed, is resist going too fast. I need to go at my own pace… We all do… In that way we operate at our maximum efficiency, and can do so for more prolonged amounts of time. In a vehicle, or on a bike, we can go into a lower gear. It simply makes things easier to do. Easier is better.

We can accept that there are going to be germs all around us, but not all dangerous. Stimulating our natural defences to become stronger, and in turn making us more resistant to the world around us. We continuously adapt to our surroundings. As do everyone else, even without us doing anything about such things. When we breathe, some things will go into our lungs, and thus through the Alveoli structures into the bloodstream. There they are wiped out by our white blood cells… The guardian soldiers of the bloodstream.  When we ingest something, there are enzymes in the saliva, and acid in our stomachs. Yet another barrier we have against the outside world. All these things have developed naturally, It is part of our natural systems that develop and adapt through our whole lifespan.

A good bit of CBT to do, is to go into a large restaurant, and watch how other people are behaving. Some will be unconsciously picking their noses, then picking up food with their fingers… Chips are more easily enjoyed when picked up individually with our fingers…  What about a cheeseburger then? They are all eating without using knives and forks. If that was a hazard, they wouldn’t to it. But they do!  I cannot make them ill! They are risking it for themselves. Can I risk it for myself? Well… When we were kids we would very likely have had packed lunches on school outings. We’ve got away with it, haven’t we?

Watching other people doing things this way, can actually reduce our urge to use the anti-bacterial gel every few moments. I would use it almost continuously. Even before Covid. In fact, the very day that Covid hit, was the very day I actually managed to put the brakes on my constantly reaching for the gels.  In a surgical setting, staff are seen to be preventing the risk of infection, and documenting it. That way they have something to show a court of law that they are sticking to protocol as regards cleanliness. Such a lot of people are out to make money by suing people for the slightest thing. And if you become unlucky enough to work in such a situation, well, I retired due to ill health.

People seem to get pleasure out of tearing others down. I guess we will all have been in the situation where we are performing some sort of task, to find people watching us, waiting for us to make a mistake, so that they, can then pick us up on it. It may give them pleasure, but not for long. Any feelings of superiority fade away quite quickly, and they find themselves having to bully someone else, in order to try and raise their own low self esteem or whatever.

True self-esteem is gained by achieving for ourselves, not by watching others fail. I have met managers who bullied staff to try and hold authority.  At school they used to say the bullies ‘grow out of it’. But as we all well know, bullies just kick others out of the way for promotion, become bosses, and wipe out efficient teams of workforce. In short, they do a heck of a lot of damage in the workplace…

People even die… Bullying is very difficult to find compromise with. It should ideally be stamped out. But that is another story…

If, when travelling through a busy shopping centre for instance, we will be neatly dodging in and ouf other people approaching us. We neatly step around… We are finding compromise with that situation. Otherwise there would be chaos… People colliding, getting very annoyed with each other.

As it is with ordinary life… We see an obstacle, find compromise with it being there, and calmly step around it. It’s not a weakness… In fact, some people may call it a ‘gift’, to be able to do that, smoothly. And with a minimum of fuss.

It takes practice, but it does get easier, the more do this, it can even become fun when trying to find items in a supermarket, for instance.

Agree to differ, and get all the shopping, hopefully without forgetting anything, (Like the one thing we’d actually gone in for in the first place!)

I need to close now… I will try and sleep off this cold… So… Until next Friday then… 22/12/2023, at about before 6 pm.

Let’s be careful out there…

Wannabe