Please, please help.

25 March 2020 - 19:47

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I posted a few times about bed sharing with my youngest son and having sexual dreams in the middle of the night about either my husband or someone random and ending up with orgasm in sleep. Sometimes I wake up immediately with this.

 

I had this the other day and I remember my son's foot was on my knee. I'm just worried that what if subconsciously I really would do something sexual or do get aroused by him touching me and so in my dream, I have the orgasm but my brain just has a dream about sex? When really what triggered my orgasm is him?

 

It sounds gross and silly to write but this is how I feel right now. I feel such a wave of depression. Having pocd thoughts is one thing but to have an orgasm in your sleep while bedsharing and not know if your son caused it is the worst I feel. Well for me. I am not putting off anyone else's issues. I am just saying it is the worst for me.

I know dreams can have a deep meaning, so this is what triggered my thinking.

Anyone else relate or have wisdom to share?

25 March 2020 - 21:52

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Hi floral85,

You sound like such a caring and nice person who loves her children and wants to protect them. I'm really not in the position to give you advice, but I really don't think you need to pay attention to your dreams. OCD will try and reach and attack you using all its tools, and one of them is your dreams. So basically it's another way of your OCD to trick you into thinking that you are a bad person, but trust me, YOU ARE NOT!
Dreams and the reactions we get from them can be weird and confusing, but you don't have to attach meaning to them. It's all brain's activity. And nothing more.

I really hope you can get better. Stay strong and don't forget to be kind to yourself. You deserve it!

25 March 2020 - 22:05

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Hey floral,
Lilac is right. Dreams *can* have a deep meaning, but 99% of the time they're just meaningless mental noise. I had sexual dreams about my Mother when she was still with us but I never harmed her in any way whatsoever. I once had a friend ( without OCD) who said he had similar dreams about his Mother... we were aged about sixteen and he just laughed about it. He was a good guy, he would never harm anyone.

26 March 2020 - 8:32

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Floral, I dont think your reactions or responses to your dreams have anything to do with the fact that when you woke you noticed your sons foot was touching your knee, to me this sounds like classic ocd.  On the other side of the argument men get random erections throughout the night whilst asleep and particularly upon waking. I know that I have awoken in a certain 'state' shall we say, and then some sort of random thought will pop into my mind and I will then attribute my physical condition to the random thought. I will usually spend however long thereafter worrying about the why's and how's etc, but then it all subsides and I know that none of it is connected or has any significant meaning.  (cant believe I just described that..! but we're all adults trying to help each other aren't we..?)..  Hope this helps a little bit.  Take care.

26 March 2020 - 12:41

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You guys are amazing. Thank you. I do feel better today. I have been doing well. I have days every so often where I overthink too much and yesterday was one of them. Thanks again

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