What is going on??

17 January 2020 - 17:02

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I’m really confused right now. I suffer from POCD (I hope, I have been diagnosed by a specialist but I still doubt) and today I watched porn (nothing to do with kids, just normal porn) for the first time in a while because I felt horny. It was fine, I didn’t have intrusive thoughts beforehand or during and I orgasmed to what was on the screen and enjoyed (sorry for the details).  But in the back of my mind I was also kind of using it to check if it still turned me on and make sure I was still normal. But after watching it,  I still felt kind of horny after. I didn’t feel any groinal responses but it felt like an anxiety that I wasn’t fully satisfied,  and it’s really distressing me because I keep thinking ‘maybe it’s because it doesn’t turn me on anymore and I would rather watch cp’, but I have ZERO desire to watch cp, not to test myself, just no desire at all. It makes me feel sick. But why am I feel constantly horny and why is porn not getting rid of it? Is it because I’m focusing on that area all the time or something worse? Pls help me 

17 January 2020 - 17:45

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Pls someone help 

18 January 2020 - 1:48

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Don’t watch porn.

18 January 2020 - 4:56

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You're overthinking. The thoughts will tell you whatever they want to tell you, they're "intrusive" for a reason, they "intrude." You don't have to listen to them. It's like a person yelling at you on the street. You have the option to ignore it, not answer it, and continue on with your day as normal. 

Short answer: Yes, it's because you are hyper focused on that area of your body. Like a bull to a red cape.

OCD is called a doubting disorder for a reason. You're fine.

BEST!

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