POCD groinal responses will be the death of me

16 April 2019 - 17:14

Profile Image
Forum User
Join date: Mar 2019
Thanks: 15

So I've been having great days recently when it comes to overcoming pocd. I feel happy when I'm attracted to guys my age and not young people which I guess just proves it's my (possible) pocd which is causing me having doubts.

I know I don't have any romantic attraction to young ones as I've always had romantic fantasies with guys my age and crushes with guys my age. And sexual attraction I have had only fantasies about romantic sex with guys my age which I'm happy if it stays that way which is nice to know.

But the problem is is that I feel like I'm developing a horrible fetish to you know what I mean... I read about p being a paraphilia instead which terrifies me as I know I love bdsm and have a fetish to a particular type of clothing. So when I want to have those dirty fantasies I only want it with guys. But the horrible thing Is, is that I can get excited with it on guys my age but trying to climax is virtually impossible ever since this (what i believe) pocd started. It's like I need an image of a young person for me to climax. I've tried to see if it would happen in my head and i could feel the climax coming so I stopped immediately and tried to think about men again but it's getting harder now which is terrifying to me. Is it likely that my mind is just in this fear mode and that's why I can only climax to that at the moment? I heard fear can sometimes control your climax.

But now I also get major groinal responses still when I'm out in public and I see young ones. It's not erections but it's still like there's strong tingling sensations like swellings. Its like my mind and heart is telling me i dont want that at all, but my groin is like oh yes you do. I know I mentally and emotionally don't want to do anything to a young one i think that's just seriously sick. But my groin is just telling me other stuff which scares me.

Is it likely that because I'm still thinking about all this, is that I'm still getting groinal responses and horrible climax situations? Again I don't want these and I don't feel happy at all when I have them. Is it just anxiety causing all this? Thank you for reading, I'm feeling like a monster again..

16 April 2019 - 21:47

Profile
Forum User
Join date: Mar 2019
Thanks: 15

Anyone?

This post has been thanked 1 time. 17 April 2019 - 0:12

Profile
Forum User
Join date: Dec 2016
Thanks: 42

People who truly are pedophiles have had the attraction to children their whole lives. There are some who are attracted to both, but they do not worry about it obsessively. You suffer from OCD, not pedophilia. It's an illness just like diabetes, except it's in your brain. You'll never act on these fears. I have been in your shoes, I know what it's like to feel like your brain is eating you alive with these thoughts that won't seem to go away. But you WILL get through this, you WILL get past all of these intrusive thoughts, and you WILL look back on this as a challenge that you overcame. I hope that you are one day able to help others who have gone through these situations after you're in remission. I promise that it gets better. 

17 April 2019 - 10:21

Profile
Forum User
Join date: Mar 2019
Thanks: 15

Thank you for that! It has made me feel much better, I know how true ps love their thoughts which is what made me better In the past but now it's like my mind is trying to convince me I like these thoughts as well, i hope that's just my ocd talking

Reply to this topic