intrusive thoughts harming loved ones

1 August 2014 - 21:16

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I have been suffering from OCD for several years now. The worst spike was when I had a baby girl and my ex girlfriend and i went home from the hospital. I had delusions and intrusive thoughts of causing harm to her and because of this I felt like the only way out was to kill myself to keep her safe. I was so distraught with these thoughts and delusions that the community care team was called out and they assessed me and assured me it was just OCD and intrusive thoughts. Social work had been involved from the start because my ex girlfriend had a drug problem. When they heard I had intrusive thoughts it was put down in the notes in the case for my daughter. Even though I am not a threat to my daughter and the thoughts and delusions are so repulsive. My ex girlfriend uses it against me and calls me a weirdo and tells everyone about it. I feel like I dont want to leave my house as I am ashamed. No wonder people dont want to talk about their mental health problems because people dont understand. I am not a bad person and I know that, I have came to terms with my OCD but I will never discuss anything with my GP again because of social work putting it in the notes and everyone in my life finding out what a 'weirdo' I am. I feel like killing myself but I couldnt do that do my family. Any advice would be helpful and very appreciated.

3 August 2014 - 0:00

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Location: England
Join date: Jan 2014
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That's awful. Its not fair on you or your daughter.

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