I can't believe it's happening again!!

3 October 2018 - 22:01

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Hi guys
So I've suffered with OCD for many years, you would think i would have the hang of it by now.
A couple of years ago I had a severe relapse with intrusive thoughts of 'what if ive harmed someone and can't remember '. This resulted in me being severely depressed for 7 months.
I had my meds changed and therapy and eventually got back to a good place.
However last week I saw something on tv about a crime and I feel like im back at square one. I have thoughts whizzing around with all sorts of horrid possibilities even though I have no memory of doing anything wrong to anyone. But what if?
I can't believe I'm stuck in this hole again. My anxiety is through the roof. How do i get through this patch?

4 October 2018 - 0:06

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Location: California
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Apply what you did the first time.

4 October 2018 - 7:24

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I dont really know how i did it . At the moment I have intrusive thoughts of horrible things accompanied by high anxiety, then questioning what type of person i am, then a brief feeling of clarity and calmness then back to anxiety. Is this my brain trying to sort through all the rubbish?
I'm SO tired!
Orwell1984 all your posts seem very clued up. Are you recovered at the moment?

4 October 2018 - 8:37

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Also something else I struggle with is when I start feeling a bit better I then think what if ive done something bad and I'm feeling better but ive left someone else traumatised. I then feel lots of guilt.
And the whole time I have no real memory of doing anything wrong just thoughts and images. I hate the images. When your in a rut like this do you think it's better to try to carry on as normal or cut yourself some slack and chill out with a film or something? I've read somewhere that people with ocd are some of the most caring people in the world so this disorder is so unfair.
Sorry for ranting on I'm just struggling atm.
Xx

6 October 2018 - 7:46

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I'm TERRIFIED I've done something wrong but can't remember it. I keep getting images flashing in my mind. I ln9w deep down it's OCD but the doubt is killing me.

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