Irrational loathing of something that others consider normal?

14 July 2017 - 23:55

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I was wondering if anyone here knows about a thing that I have that I've heard about very occasionally, but it seems to be very rare - a horror of a particular thing, or in my case it's a word (see Desperately need to talk to somebody - poison words), not because I think it will cause something bad to happen but in its own right - that thing just is, in itself, a horrible thing to me.  And yet it's not something that anyone else considers a problem.  When I try to ask people about mine, they go "But it's a nice word". 

Has anyone any knowledge of this and how you go about getting over it?  Does anyone know of anyne who's ever recovered from this? 

I'm currently pinning all my hopes on seeing a psychologist, but even when that happens, I d afraid they'll never have heard of this or know what to do about it!

15 July 2017 - 0:09

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Also please don't bully me more than you have to.  I'm sorry, I know you're supposed to be bullied and it's good for you and if you're suffering you're doing the right thing, but my main OCD thing at the moment revolves around the fear that everything is trying to force me to change in ways that I don't want to change - so going "never mind why, or whether, it's OK, just kick this", just sends me into a worse state of agitation, it really does.

This post has been thanked 1 time. 15 July 2017 - 0:15

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I do this, I just simply  dismiss it as ocd. For me it's with phrases, or words that could be hurtful to my wife. Like "what if I said this" or sometimes it will just say the phrase as if I'm actually going to say it, I've learned the quicker you dismiss it as ocd and continue acting normal even if it's there it doesn't happen as often.

I simply say "you can be there and that's okay, I'm going to continue to do this while your there." It goes away.

I'm also on medication  which has helped me use this stradegy, but I also just got diagnosed 4 months ago with ocd. 

Unlucky for my ocd I'm a stubborn person so recovery is my ultimate goal, fuck ocd.

15 July 2017 - 4:13

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I don't really understand what what you said has to do with what I said, I'm afraid, except that they both have to do with words.  Sorry if I'm being obtuse.  Thans for replying though!

15 July 2017 - 14:15

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No its exactly the same thing. I'll look at my wife and a random word will pop in my head, or phrase. The words and phrases to me are the worst thing ever, especially since they aren't things I really think or even want. 

I think the same techniques can be apllied. Label it as ocd and move on. 

I have a thing with certain numbers like 6. So I used to avoid gas pump six or store line 6. Now they are my default. 

15 July 2017 - 14:27

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The best way to look at it is, not to put a label on what type of ocd you have. Because at the end of the day, ocd is ocd is ocd. It doesn't matter if it's rocd, pocd, number ocd, pink unicorn fart  ocd. 

 

The real goal of ocd recovery is to label it as ocd and do something else healthy instead of your compulsion.

So if your compulsions are to ruminate on a word, catch yourself. Label it as ocd and move on. 

It takes a while As its like learning to swim. But if you do that regardless of the theme you'll master it vs it mastering you.

This post has been thanked 1 time. 17 July 2017 - 2:40

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Ah, the dear old dogma.  I do get very ssick of having it fotred down my throat.  I know you mean well, btu in this case what you're saying to do really dolesn't have any obvious application in the circumstnaces, and the thing you're trying to get me to admit works the same way as my OCD, really doesn't work the same way! I mean to say.  I beleive the idea with CBT is that you ignore the OCD and see that nothing terrbile does happen.  But in my csae, if I do that then by definition the thing I find terrible has happened and is happening!  Surely that calls for a different apporach?

I should stop coming on here.  There's never anything but somebody lecturing me to stop fishing around for answers that work and accept the standard method, which doesn't work for me.  And people saying that always just makes me wrose.  I just wanted to know if anyone had any suggestions for this particular thing as it seems hard to know how to tackle it just by the standard rules.  But apparently not. 

It's OK, I p;osted the same thing in another forum called Latitudes - which specialises in autisitc-spectrum things and such like - and I've actually already found several people who do recongise this.  It seems that it's common in cases of OCD that are rleated to an infection - what's known as PANS.  And we're pretty sure that's wht I have, I tested postiive for Lyme disesa.  Apparently the few people who are studying that do report that there are often certain things about the symptoms that are unusual for regular OCD - for instance, it's common to have compulsions with no obsesions at all, just desperate screaming frenzy if you can't do them.  (That's me too, usually.)

The great article of faith is always that all OCD works exactly the same way, just on differnt subjects, and therfore can be dealt with exactly the samme way, but I don't think that that's actually true.  Like I say, PANS cases aren't quite like normal OCD, and there may be other PANS cases on here all unknowingly, or other kinds of differnt.

As ofr "labelling things as OCD", I'ree tried that and it's almost driven me insane.  I have to label osme of my thoughts, in fact the ones that are most important to me, as "OCD thoughts" rather than "real thoughts".  What good des that do?  All the differnce it makes is, that I now hve so,e thoughts that I'm not to traet as real thoughts or attempt to relate them to any real thoughts, but they still seem vitally important to me and nothing has ever addressed why they're not vitally importatn, so they now exist in a parrallel univers where htey don't even have to be true or obey any logic at all.   And my mind starts to peel apart into frantically switching between "real thinking" and "OCD thinking", the latter being essential but at the same time not real.  If I've recovered any sanity at all recently, it's by having occasional flashes of taking myself seriously, and admtting that yes, I literlyy am frightened of such-and-such, and that that's literally not actually going to happen.

I may be doing it wrong.  But that's what happens when you have only a catchphrase to go on.

Sorry, I shouldn't be getting angry lie this whdn you#'re only trying to help but... actually YES I AM ANGRY!  AMATEUR CBT RUINED MY LIFE!  (More than it was already ruined.)  Please, people, I'm asking you, try to be a bit more open-minded.  Try to at least consider, when somebody says they're having a problem applying the most standard instructions to their case, whether there actually is a problem or not.  That way we might get somewhere.  Tehre may be more details to discover between us about getting over OCD than just having the One True Commandment and encouraging each other to stand firm and just keep trying to make that fit all by itslef, one size fits all.  I don't say that that isn't the right general principle underlying things in every case, but there may be cases where you'd have to think a bit more about how to make it apply in this case.  Like a water spider.  It's still basically a spider, but it has to go about some things a bit differently to make it work under water.  I think OCD as odd as mine - not jsut in its themse, but in the actual way it works - is the equivalent of CBT under water! 

18 July 2017 - 23:55

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Sorry fr that  long rant, I just felt t needed saying, and I hope some of you will give it some thought.

I've come unwillingly to the conclusion that I'd better cut my losses and stop using this forum for the moment, as in my case it just seems to make me worse. 

I think it's to do with having very shaky "insight" and my OCD being very atypical.  For someone who already did have a fairly clear undersetadnit of what was going on in their head and which bit's the obsession and which is the reality, convesrations like we have on here might be just what the doctor ordered - if both sides really do have a basic idea of what's what and just need reminding.  But I don't really have that, I often genuinely am unclear about what's wrong and what part of the problem it is that isn't really a problem, so being pushed to do things without any context or knowing why, and often when I can't see how what they're saying actually applies to what I'm saying and the person won't or can't address that and just keeps saying "it's all OCD and should be treated the same, you don't need to know why", just makes me feel that I'm being forced into something which is all wrong, and so makes me more anxious than ever about the whole idea of trying to tackle my OCD at all, which is not a good thing! 

(Also, it seeems to encourage me to do things like sitting up posting that long rant at two o'clock in the morning!    )

Sorry to leave as I like you lot and it's nice to always have somoene to talk to about it.  But if t's not helping, it's not helping.  Maybe see you all again in the futur!

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